How to Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships? 5 Effective Ways

In the words of Theodore Roosevelt, “The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people.” One of the most profound experiences we can have in our lives is our connection with other human beings. Supportive, positive, and healthy relationships help us feel happier and more content with our lives. However, there is a lot of work that precedes a healthy relationship and a lot of work that goes into nurturing it.

Building and maintaining healthy relationships requires a daily, lifelong commitment. Strong and positive relationships with your family members, friends, coworkers, and significant others take effort, care, time, and plenty of communication. 

In this article, we take a close look at healthy relationships and how to build and maintain them. Here's everything you need to know:

The Premise: What Are Healthy Relationships?

Healthy relationships are where two people appreciate and understand each other. They involve trust, honesty, open communication, and respect between partners. In a healthy relationship, there's no power imbalance. Rather, partners respect each other's independence, share decisions, and make their own decisions without fearing retaliation. 

A healthy relationship requires that both parties bring something special and unique to the table. It exists when you value who you both are as individuals, not just who you are together. 

Traits of a Healthy Relationship 

Healthy relationships bring out your best version and make you feel good about yourself. Here are some characteristics of a healthy relationship. 

• Respect for space and privacy. You don't need to be with your partner round the clock. 

• Your partner encourages you to spend time with friends in their absence, and motivates you to take part in activities you enjoy. 

• You feel comfortable expressing your concerns and opinions to your partner. 

• You feel safe as your partner doesn't force you to do things that make you uncomfortable. 

• Your partner respects your feelings and wishes, and you can negotiate and compromise when there are conflicts and disagreements. 

How to Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships

Developing positive patterns and habits to create and sustain a solid and meaningful relationship requires conscious application and repetition of good behavior and communication. Once you and your partner start doing this, a healthy and beautiful will follow and endure. 

While every relationship is different, there are some basic ways to make a relationship healthy. The following tips apply to all types of relationships – work relationships, family relationships, romantic partnerships, and friendships. 

1. Identify Needs

All relationships require work which is essentially what makes them meaningful. Whether you are just starting or continuing a relationship, make sure to identify each other's needs. 

Knowing what's important to your partner can go a long way in building goodwill and an environment of compromise. It's also vital for your partner to learn your wants and for you to express them clearly. 

How to know what you and your partner need?

You and your partner should communicate your needs, preferences, and ongoing or previous personal challenges. This will boost emotional compatibility and help you both stay on the same page. It will also deepen the relationship and let the other person know they can depend on you. 

2. Set Realistic Expectations 

No one can be everything we might want them to be. Healthy relationships involve accepting people as they are without trying to change them. 

Trade in expectations for appreciation and your whole relationship is going to change. Rather than focusing on the negatives, make a point to value and appreciate your partner's positive traits. This will take you a long way in your relationship. 

3. Communicate Effectively 

Healthy relationships are based on strong communication. You don't have to be a mind reader to know what your partner wants – chances are they've already told you. Communicating in a healthy relationship involves listening. Remember, it's not about you – it's about what you can do for the other person. According to Dr Connie Omari, clinician and owner of Tech Talk Therapy, "Communication is important in relationships because it's the single most useful way for partners to connect."

How to strengthen your communication skills?

To communicate effectively, don't interrupt or plan what you will say next when the other person is talking. You should try to comprehend their perspective fully. Moreover, you should ask questions to show you're interested. For instance, you can ask about their feelings, experiences, interests, and opinions.

4. Establish Healthy Boundaries

It's crucial to have personal boundaries to have healthy relationships. Personal boundaries are essential as they set the basic guidelines of how you want to be treated. According to an article on Forbes:

"Boundaries create trust and build healthy relationships. Even when some people don't like what you do, they will likely still respect you for standing up for what you believe in."

How to create healthy boundaries and prioritize yourself?

Talk about your personal goals, desires, and hobbies and don't lose the importance of making time and joy for yourself. It's healthy to create balance by dedicating a morning for your own time or signing off work at the end of the official work hours. Being in a relationship doesn't mean you lose being your own person. 

5. Fight Fairly 

Most relationships have some kind of conflict. This just means that you disagree about something – it doesn't mean you don't like each other. 

How to resolve conflicts fairly?

When you have a disagreement, always let your emotions cool down before talking. This way, your conversation is going to be more productive, and you won't say something you might regret later. You should also try to factually describe the behavior you're upset with while avoiding judgment and criticism. 

What Are the Signs of a Healthy Relationship?

Relationships aren't one-size-fits-all. There are several factors and qualities behind the actions and emotions that make up healthy relationships. Regardless of what your relationship is, who you love, or the history you share, all healthy relationships have one core trait in common–they should make you feel valued, respected, and trusted.  

When you want to assess if a family relationship, friendship, marriage, or any other personal connection is healthy, you should be on the lookout for the following hallmarks of healthy relationships. Knowing these basic principles will help you keep your relationship exciting, fulfilling, and meaningful. 

1. Comfortable Pace

The relationship progresses at a pace that feels comfortable and enjoyable for each person. It is normal to want to spend a lot of time with a person when you first meet them. However, you both must be on the same page with how the relationship progresses. 

When you're in a healthy relationship, you don't feel pressured or rushed in a manner that makes you feel overwhelmed. 

2. Trust 

Two people develop trust because each has proven to be reliable and trustworthy. When you trust your partner, you have complete faith in them, can depend on them, and feel safe with them. 

In healthy relationships, trust comes easily, and you need to question the others person's intentions. They respect your privacy and don't "test" you to prove your loyalty. 

3. Honesty 

You can be candid and truthful without feeling scared of how the other person is going to respond. 

In a healthy relationship, you can share the complete truth about your feelings and life with one another. If your partner doesn't like what you have to say, they will respond considerately. 

4. Interdependence

Healthy relationships are best defined as interdependent. It means you depend on one another for mutual support while maintaining your identity as a separate individual. 

In simple words, you have a balanced relationship. You know you have the other person's love and approval, but your self-worth isn't dependent on them. While you are there for one other, you don't rely on each other to meet all your needs. 

You have connections and friends outside the relationship and spend time pursuing your own hobbies and interests. 

5. Conflict Resolution 

Even in healthy relationships, you will have disagreements and feel angry or frustrated from time to time. That's totally fine! It doesn't mean you have an unhealthy relationship. 

The important thing here is how you address the conflict. You are on the right track if you can express your differences honestly, respectfully, and politely. 

Friends, partners, coworkers, or family members who address conflict without contempt or judgment can often find a solution or compromise. 

Expert Advice: Watch this detailed video about resolving conflicts in a relationship by Tony Robbins.

6. Lighthearted and Fun 

You like spending time together and bringing out the best in one another. A healthy relationship feels easy and makes you happy. You can laugh together, let loose, and just be yourself. 

Keep in mind that no relationship is fun all the time. However, the good times should indeed supersede the bad ones. 

Wrapping Up 

At the end of the day, a healthy relationship is based on trust, communication, honesty, respect, and understanding. Such connections give you the ability to learn and grow together. 

If you are concerned about your relationship or think it is not as strong as it used to be, trust your instincts and understand what these feelings might mean. You can get guidance from a therapist with regards to when additional effort can help and when it's time to move on.